The Honest Truth

Mateo has been delayed for milestones but I always chalked that up to him being about 4 weeks premature.  He took a long time to sit up, hold his head up, and roll over (this is still a process); I always joked that his head was really big but around 3-4 months I noticed that his head was a little bit of an unusual shape.  His forehead protruded quite a bit (see pic below) and he was a bit flat. At his 4 month check up the Doctor said we needed to work on repositioning so that it would even out.  We worked on this for about 2 months and it seemed to help a little bit but not enough.  He was referred to physical therapy and they said he should meet with a specialist to see if he is a good candidate for a Doc Band.  We went to the appointment and they said that he should have one and he is more in the moderate/severe  plagiocephaly range.  They put this head wrap on him and took pictures with this really fancy camera.  We were able to see his result...

  6:30pm: Heading to the hospital but had to eat my cookie first because  I KNEW that I would  not eat again until the next day. In the lobby waiting for a room. 7:00 pm: We get to the hospital to check in and wait for a room to open up.  We waited for about 2 hours before we got a room, and when we did it was not a room since they were full-it was the annex.  This was my little annex with no doors but at least I was allowed to lay down. 8:55pm My first nurse (Erica) was very nice and sweet-good for a first nurse. She told me to take the fentanyl ASAP so I wouldn’t feel pain. She did all this paper work and I got set up to be induced. I got a pill inside to Help my cervix get ready and had to wait 4 hours to see if it was working ; well 4 hours later and it didn’t work so I got another.   3:30 am: I finally got a room and started feeling contractions.  I tried to hold off on any pain meds to hopefully make my labor go more quickly (I didn’t wait s...

 * Not feeling connected to him; sure I want to make sure he is safe and protected but I do not feel that "oh my gosh/overwhelming love" feeling * I do not want to leave him, not because I am sooo connected but because my sleep schedule          *if I sleep 7pm-1:30am and then on and off 1:30am-6:00am I do not feel like I can sleep from                          7:00am-12:00pm because then I only have a couple hours of actually spending time with him. * Martin not sleeping as much as he should; sure we are partners and we should be equal but he is working and I can sleep when baby sleeps during the day          * but on the other hand, I feel like he should be helping out MORE (you see its a rough battle of back              and forth in my brain) * Not cooking dinner * Not having a clean house * Not taking Athens out (...

                                                                                    I  get a bad rap for how  I  work; I’m more difficult and I like things a particular way.      I don’t think I’m the easiest person to work with but I also think it’s because I have very typical expectations of a co-teacher.  I started teaching about 4.5 years ago and every year, minus my first full year, was really difficult. I was first paired with a guy  who was extremely sexist and didn’t want to hear any advice I gave him about student behavior (what certain students liked  and worked well for; another example: a student was not listening and then about 30 minutes later same student comes back  to hi...

  I normally try to keep certain things private but considering I am airing all my laundry on a blog for the public to see, then why not? I was recently diagnoses with cholestasis which is when the liver does not do its job and causes a build up of bile acids which is harmful (and worst case scenario, deadly) to the baby.  I have to be monitored every two weeks and get blood work taken just as frequently.  Overall, I think me and baby will be safe and I am trying to stay relatively positive because, honestly, there is nothing else I can do.  I do not want people to feel bad or pity me-that is just as bad.  But I do want to bring awareness to conditions like this.   Some things to note is that are that I started itching early on but just figured it was my skin stretching as the baby was invading my personal space.  I spoke with the doctor about it (probably around 24ish weeks) and he also said itching at the stomach is normal.  Then, a few day...

 But alas, I do not get that luxury.  If you haven't kept up with me, I am indeed16 weeks pregnant.  I have to see a perinatologist every week for the next 10 weeks due to my autoimmune condition; Sjogren's can cause blockages in the baby's heart and which can cause him have a low heart rate.  I had my first appointment today and I did not realize how scared I was until I parked my car with 15 minutes to spare.  I felt my stomach tighten; if there is something wrong, there is nothing I can do.  Essentially it is my fault if Baby M has issues, but my condition is not preventable so I don't blame myself for whatever happens.  However, it does not mean I am not nervous and scared.  That's my baby and something can happen to him that I cannot do anything about.   I am focusing on the good, though, and he is healthy.  Everything looks good and normal.  The heart looks great: blood flow, the rate, the size, everything.  I am hap...