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Showing posts from October, 2020

Love, me.

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A goal that I have for the next year, at least, is to learn to be nicer to myself and my thinking.  I already know that this is going to be extremely hard.  I am very set in my ways and I am an extremely harsh critic of myself which makes something like this difficult.  I love myself, sure.  But what I am saying is that I need to  forgive  myself-when things mess up, when work stuff happens, when life stuff happens.  Bottom line: things happen and I need to be more caring to myself.  I need to have some more self-reflection about things and realize that sometimes, shit does JUST happen.   I am a planner.  Everyone who knows me KNOWS that I am a planner.  I like to be on time-this is a big one for me.  I RESPECT peoples time and when I say I will be there AT A TIME then I will be there AT THAT TIME.  I also expect that from people.  It does not bother me for everyone to do it but it bothers me when people close to me do it.  It makes me feel as though my time is not valued.  Whether or

Reflection

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 I found this posted on Instagram through a hashtag I follow and it just stood out to me.  Oftentimes, I find that I love hard.  Normally I think it is a good thing and something I really love about myself.  After seeing my thoughts written by someone else I have found it can be unhealthy to love someone SO much, especially if it means I am loving myself less.  To this day, I focus on how to make others happy, over-perform or over-compensate, and have unrealistic expectations.  I often would justify a partners behavior which made me feel like I did something wrong.  We often forget to think about and take care of ourselves.  It is important in a relationship to take a step back sometimes and refocus.  I have thought a lot about going back to therapy and I feel like if I am thinking about it then I need to go before I become so overwhelmed that I am unsure how to cope.  I am not trying to say that my current relationship is causing me to feel like I need therapy nor am I saying that it